Welcome back!
I am sorry about yesterday's upload, but sometimes life gets in the way.
Let's jump straight into it.
Janu POV.
Chapter 12: Into the Storm
I leaned back onto my office chair.
It have been a long week and it is only Thursday.
I tapped my pen on the table as I let out a loud exhale, six more days to the trial.
I had secretly decided to temporarily move into Murat's *Abi next Sunday till the trial on Tuesday. I need to avoid my mother's drama, for now. I can't deal with a case that already stressing me out and her nagging me over marriage.
"*Tamam Mia. I will leave in a bit, I promise" I responded back. I knew she was following my mother's orders. Apparently, Mia had a bigger boss than me, my mother.
I sat a bit longer enjoying the silence before finally getting up and collected my things before leaving.
I stood by the bus stop waiting for the next bus. I took a deep breath as I looked up at the darkening skies above me. It was a starless night, the skies wore a sad skirt of black clouds.
"*Bence, it will rain tonight." Said the old lady sitting behind me at on the bench. I nodded back at her.
At last, my bus stopped.
I beeped my bus card and took the sat near the end.
Luckily, the bus was near empty.
I put my headphones on then scrolled through my playlist looking for a song matching my mood.
Finally, I found it!
(Play: Keep Us by Peter Bradley Adams)
I stared out the window at the lights across the streets as different buildings coming into sight and blurred out.
The bus stopped at a red light.
The skies started to crack above us.
A deafening thunder blew into the night, sending a shiver down my spine and through my entire body.
A lightening stricken the white huge skyscraper I was looking out at, almost blinding me.
An internal coldness took over me.
I am cold!
I crossed myself arms, hugging myself in a failed attempt to warm up myself.
I had this heaviness in my chest that no matter how much I exhaled I couldn't shake off.
I felt that this night will turn out to be stormy in many ways.
The lights across the street started to get hazy as the skies above started to drizzle.I looked at the raindrops racing down the window and then up at my reflection. With the rain over my reflection, it looked as if I the raindrops were my own. It looked as if I was crying.
I got off the bus and ran up the wet street to the house. The rain was getting heavier.
I finally reached the house. I jiggled my keys into the keyhole then pushed the door open.
I took off my shoes then ran upstairs to my room. I could hear my mother calling from the kitchen, but I was in no mood for company.
I threw my handbag next to my bed as I flopped my body into my bed and closed my eyes.
I was just tired.
I could hear my mother mumbling as she took the stairs.
1,2,3
And the door flew open "I was calling you. Can't you hear me?!"
I still had my headphones on, which only made her temper rise further.
She walked across the room and yanked the headphones out of my ears hard.
"*Aye..." I moaned as I sat up and opened my eyes.
"That's what you get for ignoring your mother." she replied back.
"*ANNE." I groaned back.
"*NE?! NE ANNE."
"Anne I am tired, please." I pleaded.
"How many times I told you not to sit on your bed with wet clothes. Ama neyse, I have great news to share with you. Aminah *Teyza and I arranged a date for you. He is her nephew, he is a doctor."
"NE?! YOU WILL GO AS FAR, AS ARRANGE A GROOM FOR ME!!! AND IF I SAID NO WHAT YOU WILL DO?!" I stood up to my feet as I started shouting.
"YOU ARE 26,*TABIKI I WILL!!!"
"*YANI?!"
"You wont score a husband if you kept this life up."
"WELL I DONT WANT ONE."
"AMA YOU NEED TO GET MARRIED."
Now we stood, face to face, eye to eye yelling at one another.
"EVER THOUGHT THAT THERE IS MORE TO LIFE THAN A HUSBAND AND A FAMILY?!!!"
"*EVET, AMA YOU CAN WORK AND GET MARRIED."
"I DONT WANT TO GET MARRIED, TAMAM!!!!" I said as I turned my back and started to walk away.
She pulled me by the arm turned me around to her as she shouted "DONT TURN YOUR BACK ON ME WHILE I TALK TO YOU. YOU WILL MEET THAT BOY. THIS SUBJECT IS CLOSED."
"*HAYIR, I WILL NEVER DO. WHY CANT YOU BE LIKE OTHER MOTHERS?! WHY CANT YOU JUST BE HAPPY FOR ME AND BE PROUD OF WHAT I ACCOMPLISHED?! WHY CAN'T YOU TAKE ME THE WAY I AM?!"
"WHAT IS WHY CANT YOU BE LIKE OTHER DAUGHTERS AND GET MARRIED AND BRING ME GRANDCHILDREN...""EVET! THAT'S ALL YOU CARE ABOUT. YOUR GRANDCHILDREN. YOU DONT CARE ABOUT WHAT I WANT."
"EVET I AM SELFISH AND YOU WILL MEET THAT BOY AND MARRY HIM. WHAT IS YOUR STUPID JOB WHEN YOU DONT HAVE YOUR OWN FAMILY?!! CAN YOUR JOB BE YOUR FAMIL, NO."
That was it, she triggered me by talking about my career like that.
"YOU ARE TRULY SELFISH. YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT ADDING MORE TO YOUR PERFECT COLLECTION OF FAMILY MEMBERS. I WISH DEDE WAS HERE, HE WOULD HAVE A FIT REPLY FOR YOU. SPEAKING OF DEDE, THE PERSON YOU DIDNT DO MUCH FOR WHEN I DID."
"*SUS, SUS. Or I will beat you." She threatened.
"*YALAN?! DIDNT I DO MORE THAN ANY OF YOU, ESPECIALLY YOU?! YOU NEVR DID WHAT I DID, YET YOU CALL YOURSELF A GREAT DAUGHTER!!! I GAVE UP MY LIFE FOR HIM."
"SUS, OR I WILL BEAT YOU." She shut her eyes tight as she voiced her threat at me.
"*HADI, GO AHEAD HIT ME. YOU HAVE GOTTEN USED TO DOING THAT LATELY WHENEVER I DISOBEY YOU. HIT ME, HIT ME FOR SHOUTING OUT THE TRUTH."
I took her hand and started to hit myself with it "HADIIIIIIIIIIII"
"*YAPMA" She begged.
But it was too late I reached my breaking point.
I dropped her hand as I went further "I LOVED HIM MORE THAN YOU EVER DID. NOW YOU ACT LIKE YOU CARE ABOUT HIM AND VISIT HIM EVERY FRIDAY. YOU ARE A HYPOCRITE!!! AND I WILL NEVER WANT TO TURN OUT TO BE LIKE YOU. A SILLY HOUSEWIFE WHO IS WEAK, TOO WEAK."
I didn't realized the weight of my words until her expression changed.
I wanted to take my words back.
But it was late, too late.
She raised her hand and the next thing was her hand landing on my face, hard.
And just like how I slapped her with my words, my mother slapped me.
My mother slapped me!
The damage was done.
My mouth hung open in shook as my eyes started tearing up.
"Anne." I said in a whispered about to cry.
"That's what you get for disrespecting me." She said in a low weak voice. As if that slap deprived her out of all her energy.
"If you live under my roof, you will follow my rules." She added.
I shook my head "SO EITHER I OBEY YOU FULLY OR I CANNOT LIVE UNDER YOUR ROOF?!! TAMAM, HAVE IT YOUR WAY. I NEVR WANT TO LIVE BY YOUR RULES AND I DONT WANT TO LIVE UNDER YOUR ROOF."
I ran to my wardrobe grabbed a suitcase, then I began stuffing it but she stopped shortly by saying "I bought that bag myself, you cant take it."
I turned around fighting back my tears "Tamam as you like. I wont take a thing from here."
I dropped the bag from my hand, closed the cabinet, grabbed my handbag and ran to my bedroom door.
Upon my last look at her, she was sitting on my bed. Her eyes stuck to the place where I dropped the bag, her bag.
I ran down stairs grabbed a jacket and I started wearing my shoes.
The front door opened revealing my father, who was soaked from the rain that had grew much heavier now.
"*Kizim, where are you going?!" he asked softly.
"Anne and I fought. I am moving out." I said in a shaking voice as I stood up.
"Kizim" He tried to make sense of the crazy news I just broke upon him.
"Yapma" I begged him, looking at the stairs, motioning to him that she needs him more than I do.
He opened his arms trying to hug me, but I ran past him to the front door. I knew if I hugged him then I will breakdown crying. I didn't deserve his mercy or sympathy.
As the front door was closing, I heard a loud sob escaping her.
I ran into the dark wet street with nothing in my ears except her cries. They blocked out every other sound including the storm roaring above me.
I ran into the dark stormy night.
My tears mixed up with the heavy rain and my loud got sobs lost in the thunder as I crumbled under the storm.
I just kept running into the storm.
*
I opened my eyes on my office. I fell asleep on the tinny sofa in my office.
I took a taxi back to my office. I lied to the building security about having unfinished work. He must have thought I was crazy showing in front of him soaked head to toe with a puffy face and eyes from all the crying I cried.
I sat up with a stiff neck and a headache. I cried all night till I fell asleep.
I massaged my neck, honestly this wasn't the time to pick up the hugest fight with my mother. I have a case in five days with not so easy of an opponent and I am moving out now!
"Oufff ya." I exhaled as I rubbed my eyes, so much to handle.
The door opened startling me as Murat's popped his head around the door. "May I come in, sleeping beauty?!" He said softly with a smile.
"*Gel." I said scooting over to make him some place next to me on the sofa.
"So" he started.
"*Babam told you right?!" I asked. He nodded back confirming my suspicion.
"What happened?!" He asked.
"Wont you invite me out for some breakfast?!" I replied.
I had no appetite but I needed some air and I wanted to escape his questions.
"You are changing the subject aren't you?!" He said with a little smile.
"Yes." I said with a weak smile.
"I fought with my mom, I brought up Dedem and what happened 7 years a go." I said as I got up.
His eyes widened in shock as he said "You went there!!! You know she will forever blame herself for that, right?!"
"Evet." I said as I headed towards the door.
Then I turned around, facing him and I added "Oh, I am moving out, by the way."
I opened the door "Breakfast?!"
*
We sat down by a little coffee shop by the ocean to have our breakfast.
My phone rang it, was Eve!
"*Bonjour Janu" she greeted me.
"*Selam Eve" I replied.
"Janu how are you?! I miss you. And may be I overreacted on our last call." She said.
I dropped my fork as I shook my head and looked over at Murat "You two think I am an idiot don't you?! Murat called you up and he told you what happened didn't he?!"
"Tamam, ama" Eve argued back.
"Tamam. I will crash at your place till I am done with this case. But if you two planned something behind my back, I will make both of you regret it." I promised.
Murat held up a napkin as if surrendering to me, which made me laugh.
"OUI." Eve shouted in excitement over the phone.
You see, Eve and my mother never liked one another. My mom think she is a crazy liberal girl, while Eve think that my mother is an oppressing monster. So this naturally excited her, according to her this was the beginning of my freedom.
But honestly to me, it was walking into a dark alley that I didn't know were it ended or when it would.
Murat left the table with the lame excuse of checking up on Melek. He was hoping I will tell Eve how I was feeling, but it didn't happen.
*
I walked into Eve's flat apartment. She left her spare keys with me "for emergencies". One of Eve's university dreams was for both of us to live together. She is crazy but that's why I love her. She is wilder than I will ever be, in the dreaming aspect at least.
I went to water her flowers on the balcony, before heading into the guest bedroom, my room. Eve never had guests over and why would she?!! She mostly stayed in France, only moved back because her father wanted her to take business over. However, she made sure I had a room at her place in hopes I do move in with her. She kept whatever I forgot over at her place in that room.
Eve will forever be my autumn. She is very sweet, but also with a short temper-wise.
As I sat on the bed she sat up for me, the bell rang.
"Who is it now?!" I groaned as I got up.
"COMING" I shouted as I headed to door.
I opened the door and to my shook it was my father with a suitcase, the same one from last night.
"Selam" he said softly.
"Selam, how are you and how is An..." my voice broke on the last word.
I looked down and away.
"Even when you are angry with her you ask about her. Ah, my soft hearted angel" He said as he lifted my chin.
But I kept my eyes down.
"Hayir. I am not an angel, I broke her yesterday." I said swallowing back the tears building up.
He dropped the bag he was carrying.
"Kizim. Janu." He said leaning down. He leaned down and tilted his head so he can look at my eyes.
And then I broke down crying.
"BABAM" I said as he opened his arms to me.
He stood in there holding me while I sobbed.
We stayed there for a few minutes before Eve's neighbor came by staring at us.
"Hadi gel, let's go inside." My father said as he picked up the bag, while his other hand laid in my back comforting me.
We walked in and sat on the couch.
I laid my head on his lap and started to silently weep. He sat silently there wiping my tears off every now and then.
After 20 minutes or so, I finally sat up.
My father held my hand and started "Kizim, your mother and you will make up. I will make sure of that." He said with a little smile.
"Ama she is very angry with me" I protested.
He interrupted me by saying "She sent you this bag to make sure you get to wear something. Plus, I left your mother in the same state that you in right now. Your are her daughter, she love you more than anything in the world."
He went on to add "You know how we always say you are your father's kizim, but you are also your mother's daughter. Tamam, you care about your career like your father, but your stubborn, your determination is what you take from your mother."
I laughed as I wiped the tears that escaped my eyes.
"Hadi gel. We will fix everything." He said as he put an arm around my shoulder.
"Baba are you mad at me?!" I asked looking up at him.
"*Neye?! I would only be mad at you if you got married to satisfy your mother and not because you want to. I will be even madder if you didn't follow your own dreams and your own path in life.' He pushed me off slightly his chest so he and I in level now 'Tamam, I want to see your children but on your terms, not mine. But also, you have to understand that your mother and I come from a very different era. We had an arranged marriage, when we were very young. She was only seventeen back then. She worries and cares about you too much. She cried all night 'where is my little girl sleeping tonight?!' I couldn't get any sleep."
He smiled back at me as he pulled me closer to his chest.
"Ama your beautiful eyes you took from your handsome Babam." he broke the silence after some time.
I cracked out another laugh for his sake.
It is true I held the most resemblance to my father. I am the closest to my father as well. I was the son he never had before, I came after two girls. So I was the one he taught about cars and football. Even when my first brother came six years after me, I was already his son.
"Baba is there a match tonight?!" I asked as I sat up trying to distract him and myself.
He let out a laugh after which I joined in with him.
"This shall pass as well, Janu." He said softly as he pushed my hair away from my face.
I got up after that to switch on the smart TV Eve have.
Just then, I had a hunch that this was only the beggining of the storm.
-----------------------------------
TURKISH WORDS
*Abi -brother
Just then, I had a hunch that this was only the beggining of the storm.
-----------------------------------
TURKISH WORDS
*Abi -brother
*Tamam -okay
*Bence -in my opinion
*Aye - (kind of expression Aa)
*ANNE -mom
*NE -what
*Teyza -aunt
*TABIKI -sure
*YANI -so
*EVET -yes
*HAYIR -no
*SUS -keep quiet
*YALAN -lie
*HADI -come on
*YAPMA -dont do that
*Kizim -my daughter
*Gel -come
*Babam -my father
*Selam -hey
*Neye -what
---------------------------------
FRENCH WORD
*BONJOUR -hello
*Aye - (kind of expression Aa)
*ANNE -mom
*NE -what
*Teyza -aunt
*TABIKI -sure
*YANI -so
*EVET -yes
*HAYIR -no
*SUS -keep quiet
*YALAN -lie
*HADI -come on
*YAPMA -dont do that
*Kizim -my daughter
*Gel -come
*Babam -my father
*Selam -hey
*Neye -what
---------------------------------
FRENCH WORD
*BONJOUR -hello
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